Our favorite books on grief and grieving
How is it possible to be grateful for life’s simple pleasures, while accepting that the holidays feel less joyful than they used to be? Despite being surrounded by caring friends and family, the absence of our other halves is a void that will always live within us…and the holiday season amplifies it.
For Vanessa, the holidays carry a particular ache, because they were always Simon’s season. At the first hint of December, he brimmed with childlike enthusiasm, filling the house with carols and stories of Christmas in England—village fairs, church choirs, and stepping out of midnight mass into a world newly covered in snow. His enthusiasm lit up their home, giving it a holiday spirit and warmth that can sometimes feel irreplaceable. For Alison, peak holiday joy always involved spending time with James. The meditative joy of preparing meals—as well as eating at New York’s finest restaurants and supporting neighborhood favorites—are sweet activities that continue to keep their love alive.
Such is the nature of grief and grieving: It’s central to the human experience, but unique to us, and to each person lucky enough to know the ones we lost. We crave their voice, the warmth and joy in their humor, and the comfort that comes from having them by our side.
In the early stages of grief, it feels like no one understands what you’re going through. The shock, pain, and tears feel like they will last forever, and come in waves that leave you feeling helpless. When the wave passes, it’s easy to feel unprepared and daunted by the prospect of building a new life, forever changed and shaped by your significant other.
On days when you absolutely can’t leave your house, books on grief and grieving can be a lifeline—they were for us. They gave us a physical way to move forward and cope…and a language to describe feelings you didn’t know were possible.
Here are some of our favorite books on grief that helped us in those dark early stages. If you are grieving the loss of a spouse or loved one, we hope you will find some comfort in these pages. These are also meaningful gifts for loved ones going through hardship.
May your holidays be full of love, selfcare and healing. We recommend trading them with fellow widows to make the journey a bit easier.
A Widow’s Guide to Healing
There’s no way around it: Becoming a widow is overwhelming, and we have to face many of the required tasks alone. Written in a comforting way with worksheets for key tasks—such as navigating the legal system, wills, taxes and estate planning—this guide covers the practical subjects you might not be ready to discuss, such as a plan for dating, relationships, and a game plan for your future. A necessary companion to anyone in the first five years of grieving.
Healing After Loss
With an emphasis on prayer and spirituality, this compact page-a-day book offers an easy way to tend to your grief year round. Just flip to the page that matches the date on the calendar, and you’ll get a thought-provoking quote, a couple paragraphs incorporating it into your grief journey, and some food for thought to carry with you as you move forward.
Anxiety: The Missing Stage Of Grief
If you’re someone who suffers from anxiety—or love someone experiencing loss who has it—this book is for you. The author’s background and experience as a grief counselor lends an authoritative tone to essential helpful chapters, such as taking charge, retraining yourself, and understanding your story of loss. Like Xanax in paperback form!
Signs
One of the weirdest things about losing someone you love is that everything around you seems like it has new meaning. Some items and situations seem to serve as messages from your partner, calling to you from the other side of the veil. Instead of ignoring these signs, the author teaches us how to tap into their meaning as part of the healing process, and appreciate the unexplained synchronicity that makes us feel eternally connected to our loved one.
Support the ranch and our business! We’ll earn a commission for book purchases made via these links.
Vibes From The Other Side
In a similar vein, this fun book—written by a clairvoyant medium astrologer—teaches you to notice and get answers from your spirit guides. If you’re skeptical, don’t be! Your can receive messages from everything from contact dreams and spirit animals, to tangible symbols like ears ringing, falling objects, or changes in room temperature. Computers freezing and technology working on its own are also signs of your late love at work.
It’s OK That You’re Not OK
One of the most frequently-recommended books on grief, the author, a therapist, lost her partner to drowning. Since then, this book has given fellow widows permission to give into their emotions—no matter how crazy—when navigating grief. From dealing with its side effects to learning to live in the reality of your loss, and forming your “after” tribe, consider this book permission to let it all out in any way you please.
Your Grief, Your Way
A great gift for family members, this handy read offers guidance and comfort to any griever who thinks no one has experienced depths of pain and loss quite like they have. It addresses the different ways people grieve, from action-oriented therapies to comforting quotes and words. The page-a-day format offers easy to remember, tangible ways to process loss, from comebacks to unsympathetic people to reassurance that the departed will always stay alive.
How To Be Sad
The cultural problem with grieving is that we have been told to “get over it” or “get on with life” far too quickly, to the point where we might be suppressing our feelings in unhelpful ways. This optimistic book offers guidelines on how to sit with your sadness, to pay attention to your mind and body’s signals about the best way to keep on living. Consider it your ray of sunshine and companion in grief, until you’re able to clear a path forward that makes sense.