How grief is changing our understanding of health
Happy New Year! Our holiday season was filled with joy and sweet moments, yet—like a snowstorm—grief would suddenly appear. That’s okay. It’s all part of the journey. As with many aspects of the grief process, we’ve been reflecting on how it has changed us. One big way has been how it has expanded our definition of health.
While society rewards those who follow strict workout routines or clean diets, this framing sometimes misses out on the importance of balance and living in tune with our emotions. For us, a calming glass of wine, a piece of rich chocolate cake, or Netflix and popcorn on the couch with our cats or pups (instead of a trip to the gym) have all been important forms of self-care during the journey of grief and healing.
This is a new way of being for us. Before our losses, we felt happy when we believed we could control our health through rigorous fitness routines, or by searching menus for the most nutritious option. Now, eating foods for pleasure and emotional solace, aka “comfort food”, is a welcome part of our world. The predictability of pausing for mealtimes, the warm memories a certain dish conjures, and the grounding act of cooking or baking itself, soothes and nourishes us emotionally.
The nutritional breakdown is only part of the equation when it comes to health. We love this 1980’s study that showed rabbits fed a high-cholesterol diet who also received pets and cuddles had much better blood markers (indicators of overall health) than those who received the same diet but no love and care.
You could say self-care is now our number one priority. While people around us are writing New Year’s resolutions with a focus on “discipline” and “optimization”, we’ve decided that those will be dirty words in 2026. As will anything that prioritizes achievement and efficiency over listening to what our minds, bodies, and hearts need in the moment. Just the sound of them gives us a full body feeling of overwhelm.
Our advice to you: If you’re going through loss, allow yourself to reach for foods that make you feel nourished both physically and emotionally. Craving takeout from your favorite pizza place? Order it! Missing your grandma’s famous key-lime pie? Bake it! Listening to your emotional needs is a gentle way to thank your body for healing during such an intense time.
And also, rest. It can feel so rebellious in today’s fast-paced world, but hibernation restores us so we can continue to face the realities of life. If there’s anything we’ve learned over these past years, it’s that deadlines, assignments, and demands can wait if you’re not feeling well, or you’re simply not up to it. Taking time to comfort yourself and asking, “Does this support me right now?” will help you get through the hardest days, whether you’re just beginning your grief journey or feeling pulled back into it.
We’re proud of ourselves for listening to what we need, even when it’s not what society values. Through this season, we’ve developed a deeper respect for our bodies, just the way they are– resilient in ways not forged in the gym, but through tenderness, rest, and care. As the new year starts, we encourage you all to give yourself extra grace—you may find yourself feeling healthier because of it.